Hi, I’m Lise, perpetual third wheel, endlessly optimistic romantic, and now, the founder of Goblins! I’ve always been creative in searching for my person. From attempting to outsmart algorithms to freeing people from Rose Jails, traditional methods had mixed results. So— I let the NY Post set me up on a blind date ; used pick-up limes ; and volunteered to paint a nursing home… sadly I was the only one who didn’t have a mandatory community service sheet to be signed at the end. Most recently, I’ve even had friends manage my dating apps. If you know, you know, the dating apps are like, really, really bad... and it sucks to be at the mercy of them. Despite Best Efforts I know what it feels like to carry loneliness in your bones. Simple Plan's lyric “I’ve got a lot of friends, but I don’t hear from them” hits differently as an adult. It’s not anyone’s fault—life gets busy, people have their own commitments, and whether you’re single or partnered, loneliness just has a way of sneaking in. In June of 2023, I had an idea There HAD to be a better way to use the internet to meet people. So, I decided I’d create a profile about myself… and the kind of people I was looking to meet. Think: a gamer friend application/ dating doc . If I caught anyone’s eye, they could use Calendly to schedule a time to meet up in World of Warcraft and we’d play while voice chatting. I’d initially planned to film a TikTok series but I soon realized this had more potential than just a social experiment for my dating life. The premise—a refreshingly different, lower-pressure way to intentionally find connection and belonging—didn’t just apply to romantic relationships. This had the potential to help people of all kinds forge meaningful connections, from finding new gaming pals to building lifelong friendships. This realization marked a shift What started as Date Like Goblins , a dating tool for gamers, has since evolved into what we're colloquially calling Goblins , a space designed to help all gamers connect—romantically or otherwise. It’s been a natural expansion that reflects our belief that intentional connections, no matter the type, are the foundation of a fulfilling life. Whether you’re LGBTQIA+, neurospicy, introverted, and/or just not into the usual ‘swipe-right’ scene, Goblins is a space where you’re not simply accepted, but celebrated for who you are. We thrive on the diversity of our members and the unique ways we all seek to connect. Our OGs (original Goblins) have been instrumental in helping us develop our early platform, and we look forward to continuing to build with and for our community. If you’re excited about what we’re creating, pop into the beta and join our Discord , and/or subscribe to this blog. It’d be an honor to have you join the Goblin movement! Chaos and Cheetos,

Fish pics were famously the most hated type of photo on dating apps, with  Tinder even joking about officially banning them .  Thankfully, they’ve become a rare species (at least in my swiping experience). But fear not, a new contender has emerged. And dare I say, it might be even more cringe than its fishy predecessor. Bug pics. These are selfies taken from bizarre, unflattering angles—always with the guy looking down  at the camera. The expressions vary, but are generally vacant stares, vaguely menacing frowns (a failed attempt at Blue Steel?), or a smirk that’s more unsettling than charming. The result? The point of view of a bug that’s about to get squished. Our Founder Lise recreating actual photos from men on the apps A different angle/expression does wonders So y'all, please replace those. They’re weird and not your best angle (by far).  Want to optimize your social profiles and socialize better online and offline? Check out Goblins University for a wealth of insider advice – we have an entire session on upgrading your photo game. We even share a life hack for folks that think they don’t photograph well.

I spend a lot of time reflecting on my comedically bad dating track record. While it’s provided no shortage of entertaining stories, I genuinely believe it’s the reason I could ideate Goblins—it’s given me a front-row seat to how dating has evolved (and in many ways, devolved). Looking back on my bad dates over the last fifteen years, dating was always challenging—but the wheels used to fall off later down the funnel. People at least put in some effort: there was a shared intention to meet, clear plans were made, and conversations were two-sided. It wasn’t always great, but it took longer for things to go off the rails. Now, for whatever reason, the bad dating experience happens right off the jump. With thousands of options at our fingertips and the illusion of endless choice, effort has collapsed at the earliest stages. Profiles are low-effort and devoid of substance. Matches turn into dead-end conversations where responses trickle in but no questions are asked in return. If a date is suggested, it’s vague and non-committal: "We should do something sometime."  And when dates do  happen, it’s become uncomfortably common for cisgender straight men to walk away thinking they had an excellent date—completely unaware that their date asked all the questions and did all the listening. They’re then baffled when they don’t get a second date, the cycle continues, and they become resentful they're not having any success. Of course, this perspective is rooted in my personal experiences, as well as those of women in my network, and across TikTok. But the pattern is hard to ignore and it's why we insist on hand-approving profiles at Goblins to screen for substance in a profile-- much to the chagrin of some unhappy people. And psst, no we don't base it on photos. "Ok, but I added what I’m mainly looking for, why does that even matter? Shouldn’t it just be enough that my profile isn’t inappropriate? Other apps approve profiles immediately if they don’t break the rules. Plus, you’re just making more work for yourself by being this strict." - Someone who's profile was not approved I’ve spent some time reflecting on why dating feels so broken, and I've identified a phenomenon that I'm calling the Potato Chip Theory . Imagine dating as a potluck dinner. The majority of attendees nowadays? They're showing up with a bag of potato chips- bare minimum, low-effort. And yet, they're frustrated when people who brought deviled eggs (in this economy!) or hamburgers aren't interested in engaging. The audacity and entitlement are incredible, why would someone who invested time and effort want to share with someone who didn't think it was worth bringing more to the table (literally and figuratively)? What’s worse, is when the folks who brought potato chips are also indignant that everyone else brought potato chips. Why is the selection so disappointing? Because you and everyone else opted for the lowest-effort option! Again, a baffling lack of self-awareness—expecting a five-course meal while offering nothing but a bag of chips. And no, that Marilyn Monroe "If you can't handle me at my worst..." quote doesn’t apply here. No one’s interested in investing in what you could bring to the table when the starting point is... nothing. This is why at Goblins we don't care when people get angry when we insist on hand-approving all profiles. Honestly? We’re proud of that (and I like irritating over-inflated egos). Sure, it definitely creates more work for me and my team, but we want Goblins to be known for having a quality, engaged community. We’re exclusively inclusive — kind of like Raya, except we don’t care about how hot you are or how many followers you have. We just require putting in a little effort for the people you’re hoping to meet.

My dating track record has always felt supernaturally  bad—like, “friends perk up at brunch when they hear I’m back on the apps because the stories are that jaw-dropping” bad. And it’s not for lack of screening. No matter how discerning I’ve been, my dating life has consistently played out like a romantic comedy... just very light on the romance. There was the guy on a second FaceTime date who talked non-stop for 45 minutes, and when I finally excused myself, he protested, "But I didn’t tell you about my amulet—I tried blood magic, and it actually worked!" Then there was the first date who explained over dinner that he couldn’t drink alcohol because, in high school, a vial containing a mysterious virus  broke in his science class, and that  was one of the lingering side effects. That same man also confessed to having an ice cream fetish before the night ended, we hadn’t even so much as hugged. And how could I forget the guy who swiped right because my profile said, "I know what I’m doing 80% of the time,"  but then over drinks told me he was disappointed I hadn’t meant it literally—because he was in the middle of a life experiment  where he scheduled his entire existence in 15-minute increments for three months. Yes, I immediately called bullshit and asked to see his calendar. He wasn’t lying, he even scheduled his pooping. He also didn’t like dogs. And those are just the ones that immediately come to mind. It. Has. Been. Brutal. But recently, it struck me: without a decade of the universe throwing these absurd experiences my way, I wouldn’t have been able to conceptualize  Date Like Goblins. It was out of sheer desperation that I finally took a step back and thought, "There has to be a better way to meet people online—one that doesn’t involve these ridiculous IRL encounters."  If my dating life is going to be a train wreck, I’d at least rather navigate it while playing games—without having to leave my house or look cute. After quitting my job in 2022, I tried doing stand-up comedy for the first (and last) time, and my bit began with my horrible dating experiences. So full circle! That’s why building Goblins has been such a labor of love. We’re tackling problems I feel in my bones: loneliness, the broken dating space, and the challenges of socializing as a neurospicy human with limited spoons. As a founder, I think constantly about dating and human connection—how dating apps have evolved (ahem, been enshittified), how dating culture has shifted, the psychology behind how we bond, and how Goblins can address these challenges at their core. All that reflection led me to a theory I call The Potato Chip Problem —my take on the devolution of modern dating. More on that in my next post—stay tuned!

Early on in the Goblins journey, I took on the role of profile gatekeeper—partly to avoid surprises (read: d*ck pics) but also as quality control. This isn’t about exclusivity… trust me, we’re basically the anti-Raya. Instead, it’s about creating a space where effort and authenticity thrive. As Chief Goblin Officer, I feel responsible for ensuring Goblins have a shot at meaningful connections when on the platform. And part of this process is only approving profiles that reflect thoughtfulness and effort. Why? Many folks forget that getting good results require good effort put in. It’s tempting to slap together a bare-bones profile just to “see what’s out there,” but this leads to two things: Frustration when their profiles don’t inspire matches or messages. A subpar experience for everyone else scrolling through uninspired profiles . At Goblins, our mantra is simple: Have the Profile You Wish to See on the Apps. Effort is attractive, and the energy you put into your profile creates the foundation for real connections. That’s why we ask users to add some personality before entering the Goblinverse. If they choose not to? That’s okay—they’re probably not the right fit. #SorryNotSorry So, when crafting your profile—on Goblins or elsewhere—ask yourself: What kind of connection am I looking for? And does my profile invite it? P.S. We know that writing about yourself is tough (especially if you’re an introvert) so here’s some advice that might help! Garbage attracts garbage!

Having reviewed hundreds of thousands of dating app profiles over the last decade both personally and professionally, I’ve identified why profiles aren’t successful. From the obvious to the subtle, here are the most common reasons your profile isn’t getting matches: Overall no-to-low effort profiles- I’d say this covers the majority of profiles on the apps. Those that contain anything along the lines of “not sure what to put so just ask!” or “idk, will fill this out later” scream “I’m just here to look at other people’s profiles”. Remember, would you be happy if all the profiles you looked at had the same level of effort yours did? Unlikely. Here are my tips on authoring a better one! A bad profile has the bare minimum of detail, the better one has Photos-only- A bit redundant from the above, but worth double-clicking into. I don’t care how strong your face card is, if there’s nothing besides photos in your profile to react to, it’s an immediate pass. Nothing substantial- Is there anything especially personal about your profile or does it feel like it could apply to half the population? Ie: “I love to laugh” or “I like to hang with friends”. Your wish list- If your profile is spent talking about what you do and don’t want in a partner, delete it and write something about yourself. Self-Critical- I’m all about putting your most authentic self forward but don’t trash-talk yourself. Describing yourself as “depressed”, “boring”, or complaining about your lack of success with online dating are red flags. You can’t expect a good response from potential partners if your first impression is self-loathing. Weird/unflattering photos- Realize this one can be difficult but definitely do a photo audit (there are SO many articles about this ). Mixed messages- Are you 43 years old saying you’d like to have kids but are still “figuring it out”/“looking for casual/short-term” but “open to long-term”? While it might be tempting to cast your net and attract connections of all kinds, this isn’t going to resonate super well (especially if you’re a cis-gender, straight man). Perplexingly bad usernames, content, etc: Why have you chosen a username like WetShart49? Don’t put anything off-putting, gross, crass in your profile even if you’re doing it to be “funny”, no one’s going to get the joke (whatever it is). It can be frustrating to author a dating profile when you’re introverted or don’t feel conventionally attractive but remember— if you put personality and effort into it, you’re already a breath of fresh air! Here are my tips on maximizing your profile— and if you’re still stuck, feel free to ask for some recs in the #Profile-Feedback channel on the Goblins’ Discord .

OkCupid appears to be self-destructing and as someone who LOVED the personality-first, questions-heavy profiles, this makes me super, super sad. My personality is WAY better than my photos so image-first dating apps with bite-sized profiles (if any) really aren't my jam. It took a bit, but I realized using the "perfect" pictures or the "coolest" bio didn't work. What does? Embracing your quirky, funny, and unapologetic self... even if that means looking a little uh... unHinged. 🥁💥 Screenshots from my Hinge profile, wow such chaos. Whether short (Bumble, Tinder, etc) or long ( Goblins , Firefly , OkCupid)– your profile is your bat signal. Help your people to find you…and actively weed out anyone that thinks you're weird/too much/etc. You'd find them too normal/dull for you anyway! :D The best part? You make it so much easier for people to message you because they have something to respond/react/ask you about! Here are my tips for authoring an awesome profile that does you justice (no matter how introverted or self-conscious you are): Be authentic, looking cool be damned Really. Looking cool is so high school. And high school sucked, so no more of that. While it's tempting to describe what you should have on your profile, you want to find the people who will embrace the real you, not the ideal version of yourself. So lean into it! What’s your perfect day-off look like? I might want to put: Go for a hike and then hit up a brewery! Instead, I’m writing: Set my alarm for a reasonable time, probably turn it off and sleep in a little bit longer. Yelp an awesome diner or locate a spot for the best [cinnamon roll, baked bread, etc.] and take a road-trip to it. Use Atlas Obscura to find any worthwhile detours and/or look for some thrift shops and see who can spot the weirdest thing in there. End the day with a movie night on the couch or assemble some friends for board games. Progress over perfection Your profile doesn’t have to be Shakespearean. Start with whatever you feel represents who you are, even if it's just a list of facts about yourself– you can edit if/when inspiration strikes later. We have a ton of quirky, fun prompts you can answer on Goblins but here are some ideas for any “Meet Our Hero/About Me” section. When I have free time I like to… Something I’m really good at / proud of is… I spend a lot of time thinking about… A guilty pleasure of mine is… One thing that never fails to put me in a good mood is… You can always count on me to… [Talk about your pets!] I work as a [insert what you do here] but I feel like in a multiverse, I’m a [enter whatever you think you might be doing here!] One thing I’m oddly passionate about is… Something I wish more people knew about me is… I like to collect… The best advice I’ve ever received is… A habit or ritual I can’t go without is… Don't overthink it As the queen of overthinking, know this is easier said than done- but remember, your profile doesn't need to impress or convince anyone you’re interesting. Glimpses into who you are and what makes you unique will resonate with the right people, so just start by writing something. P.S. If you think we'd get along, send me a game invite on Goblins . My username is Lise 💚

As the founder of a platform that emphasizes authentic connection, it feels important to formally introduce myself and give you a glimpse into who I am. So hello, hi, howdy! I’m Lise (pronounced like " new lease on life" ) and... I was a horse girl growing up, and frogs were my favorite animal It took two tries to get my driver's license I set a morning alarm a little earlier than I have to actually wake up– it makes me so happy seeing I have more time to sleep. <- I realize it’s absolutely unhinged but I stand behind it Nostalgic tech is one of my favorite things to bond with people over. AIM, Encarta CDs, Day of the Tentacle, Chex Quest, Furbys, Tamagotchis, etc. I used to Venmo request friends $.75 for Art. When they accepted, they got a photo of themselves riding a possum Little me, playing Math Blaster When I was 15, I took a Seventeen Magazine quiz on the back of my dad’s car- it was titled something like What Should You Be When You Grow Up. Based on my results, the recommendations were zookeeper, event planner, or PR exec. And the rest, as they say, was history: In my PR agency days, I was Hinge’s first publicist and eventually snagged them coverage in The New York Times , TIME , and Glamour . I worked with Mashable on Bill Nye explaining evolution using emoji for a GE project . The video got half a billion media impressions and was later referenced as an answer in the New York Times ’ crossword. My absolute favorite job was as the head of PR for Shapeways. I fell in love with the intersection of tech and all-things community after delving deeply into the Warhammer space. A decade into my career, my dad passed away and I found myself grappling with the existential crisis of life, love and purpose. Practically comatose with grief, I quit my job to figure out what should come next– personally and professionally. It took a while but after ideating Goblins, I started waking up feeling inspired again. At the intersection of my personal and professional strengths and passions, Goblins also feels like something that could make the world a little better for a lot of people. And so, I've been pet sitting around the country while (mostly) bootstrapping bringing the platform to life. My team's and my goal? Be able to pay ourselves to work on Goblins full-time while building for and with our community . It's no secret I have feelings about the Match Group and other dating apps out there, so we're also carefully architecting the platform to avoid enshittification– more on that later, I promise. I'm always in our Discord (@LadybugLise) so please feel free to jump into our server and say hello, ask questions, or share some quality memes with the team and I! Me, riding a giant possum. Popular photo on dating apps (=gets a lot of questions).